On James

Suddenly, I find myself drowning in an pit of depression.

Yes, I am starting to turn this blog in to a cheesy paperback novel but I guess that's just how I see my life. One big lump of cheesy Mills and Boons.

The more that I realize that I don't know James, the more that I fall for him.

Once again, I am defeated by the illogical part of my brain. It functions solely by deeming itself to futile ideas.

James is someone I haven't met. He was introduced to me by a friend. At start, I wasn't really interested because I was not at the habit of searching for anyone. We have been in constant communication through MSN Messenger and through the same medium, we knew each other well. Somehow, as days passed by, the constant chatting was turned into something deeper.

Things changed. It wasn't what it was before. All after a phone call.

Although at start, It was I who was nonchalantly dealing with the situation. I didn't give much attention to his signs until it was all gone. I guess I didn't really like the fact that he left me without knowing the other facts that I have.

But all is fair, I didn't know much about him either. Or is it?

Sometimes, I ponder at the situation. Is it my turn to coax him? Is it my turn to try and make him fall for me? He is such a nice person, I end up thinking about him more and more. And the more I think about him, the more I realize that I don't know him which makes him more interesting.

I wonder if he would like flowers. I like flowers. Wouldn't they be a lovely gift for a lonely heart?